Sunday, January 13, 2013


I've got something I want to get off my chest. Yesterday we were giving Anthony's brother a ride to pick up his car, and before we could get Katie buckled into her carseat, she threw a tantrum. Not the worst one I've seen, by any means, but a bit of a screamfest. You know the ones - "Do you want your water?" "NO!" "Do you want your lambie rattle?" "NO!!!" "How about Sophie?" "NO!!!!" "Would you like to play with stickers?" "NO! NO! NO!" and so forth.

The tantrum lasted about 10 minutes, and at one point I had to get out of the parked car and walk her up and down the street. When we finally got her settled down and buckled in, Anthony's brother said, "Once you have a second kid, the tantrums are a lot less frequent." I thought this was an odd thing to say, since his first child was six years old when he had his second. I would hope by age 6 the tantrums would be less frequent, and I said so. He said, "No, I've heard it from friends with kids who are close in age. It's because the first kid knows they have less of your time and attention once the new baby comes."

This bothered me even more. It implies that the reason Katie is throwing tantrums now is because she knows she can get away with it. And that's because I've *let* her get away with it. That thought makes smoke come out of my ears! Is the implication that I'm somehow giving Katie too much time and attention and that's leading to tantrums? (More smoke is coming out.) And if we take it a step further, is having 15 kids the solution to tantrums, because none of them will get much attention at all? I'm not a fan of that family that keeps on having kids, but I bet you their kids have all had tantrums at age 2. 

Age 2 is the tantrum age. 2 year olds and tantrums are like bread and butter. Peanut butter and jelly. Peas and carrots! And I don't think Katie has them because she thinks she can get away with it. I think she has tantrums because it's darned hard being a toddler and she has no other way to express her frustration and anger. I'm working myself up into a tantrum myself! :) 

Well, moms of the blogiverse, what do you think? Am I off my rocker?


  1. Nope, you are solidly on your rocker. 2 year old have tantrums. As do 3 years olds, and sometimes my 4 year old pulls them out, but it is much less often. Children are learning how to express themselves and that is one way they do it. That you are the cause of it with attention and time is laughable. I don't know what his intention was, maybe to make you feel better, like "hey look, here is a light at the end of the tunnel." Who knows. I am surprised that you didn't throw a tantrum yourself, way to be mature there! :)

    Keep on keeping on, you are doing great!

    1. Thanks Erin! :) You're right; his intention probably was to make me feel better. The interesting thing is, I wasn't embarrassed or upset about Katie's tantrum. For once I handled it with complete calm, and I was really proud of myself! LOL. Anyway, thanks for the perspective!